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#028 What if it was your multi-million dollar idea that you were building… but you didn’t own it yet? 

And what if the people that did own it… what if they fired you and your spouse at the same time without notice?

What do you do? What comes next?

Paul and Kelsey Tompkins thought they had found a dream adventure. After a year building of building a company from the ground up… they were fired… same day… same time.

With nothing to fall back on but their network, they were forced to start over from scratch.

 

Tune in to discover…

  • How being an entrepreneur can still mean having a job and not a business.
  • When being comfortable can be a curse… and how it may require intense discomfort to jumpstart your real destiny.
  • Why your ten-year vision means nothing without this.
  • How to create boundaries between your personal and professional lives

 

Paul and Kelsey provide tips you can apply today to help strengthen your marriage and create more balance in your working relationship.

Thank you for listening!

 

Always Forward,

Joe

Resources Mentioned:

Paul Tompkins 0:05

Within five minutes, he told us we remote that of jobs. We had till five o'clock to turn in our keys, get our stuff off property that we had there and to move on.

Joe Pomeroy 0:18

Welcome everybody to this week's episode of the Forward with Joe Podcast on our show today. I'm so excited to have another married couple so that we can hear both of their perspectives. We have Paul and Kelsey. They are the real estate expert gurus in anything you need from flipping a house to wholesale sales. If you're looking to get in the real estate world at all. They are your people. They own a company called flippin experts. And we'll hear more about that in just a minute. But what I'm most excited about is your the two of you have an incredible journey and we get to hear it from both perspectives. Welcome, Paul. Welcome, Kelsey, to today's show.

Kelsey Tompkins 0:56

Thank you for having us.

Paul Tompkins 0:57

Yeah, happy to be here, man.

Joe Pomeroy 1:00

All right. So I want to rewind a little bit, because you guys haven't always been the flippin experts. Which by the way, I love the name. I assumed you were going for a Christian curse word here.

Paul Tompkins 1:11

We weren't Joe. It was like we because we flip houses, right? So we're thinking, flipping and houses and flipping. And we want to help people be the expert at that like our students to go from like, just starting out or being a newbie to flip in it. So we're like, we're on the flip. And we want to be an expert. We're like flipping experts. And it just started picking up and then all of a sudden, we're like, we're posting stuff. And it's like, this is flippin awesome. And I'm like, that kind of sounds like a cuss word. So we were already too deep into that we stayed with it.

Joe Pomeroy 1:39

You know, you gotta own it, and you go with it. So sometimes we hear the word expert, and we hear a guru and we're like, oh, great, another guru or another, and there can be a negative connotation to it. So it's almost funny where it's like, yeah, we're the flippin experts. What are you gonna do, but that's really what you guys specialize in is teaching others specifically married couples. How They can do this for themselves. And it all begins with your journey when the two of you got fired at the same time. Let's go back to there and tell us about that.

Kelsey Tompkins 2:09

Absolutely. So I would say in our first year of marriage, we experienced more than most couples would experience and maybe even a decade, dare I say, we were married. Within a week, we were moving to a new location away from all of our family and friends. And we were launching a multi million dollar company, we were a part of a special launch team. So we were working together and then the day came where the business was changing directions and we lost our jobs, both our incomes together on the spot unexpectedly.

Paul Tompkins 2:40

Yeah, it was it was crazy job because like we have came up with the idea for this business. We had went out and met with the sellers. We had negotiated it down millions of dollars, got it off the ground. They're like hey, we want you to go launch it. We're like we're in we love it. This is why we brought it to you, the investors and got it up, got it run and got launched and then you years later, we heard rumors, it might tweak, it might change a little bit, but how you guys have jobs, don't worry about it, you're good. And we're like, okay, that's cool. And then the CEO one day just shows up. And we're like, CEO never shows up and pulls us into the office and sits us down and, and we thought something was something was changing, no big deal. And within five minutes, he told us, we were both out of jobs. We had till five o'clock to turn in our keys, get our stuff off property that we had there, and to move on.

Joe Pomeroy 3:32

Wow.

Paul Tompkins 3:33

And these are and these were even people that we knew. So it's not like it was just some company like these were people in our lives for years. So it wasn't just a you don't have jobs overnight. It was it was personal to which was a whole nother level right you feel maybe betrayed a little bit or hurt a little bit or whatever it might be. But it wasn't just loss of job it was guys you have 13 days left of insurance on your property. I mean, on your on your health insurance and you have and we had moved out for that job, right, we had moved several hours away got a house out here just for this job. Well, when they let us go at this job, how do you move back? I have no proof of income. We were both fired. I can't say hey, call my employer, I want to buy another house. This could take 30 - 45 days to close on it. We were fired on the spot, just because they were transitioning the company and they didn't need our services anymore. So yeah, that was that was a tough blow for us. Because it wasn't one paycheck. It was all money coming in. It was our health insurance. It was what do we do for living? Are we moving home? Are we staying here? What kind of job can you find in two weeks? So that's kind of where we started. Joe?

Joe Pomeroy 4:40

There's a lot to unpack there. Yeah, I mean, we could spend the entire time just on that aspect of the story. And I fell into it into a similar job as well. I was working with someone that I believe to be a close personal friend. And I think sometimes individuals can find themselves in the corporate world and maybe they feel that entrepreneur itch But they don't do anything about it because they feel safe. Oh, I know the boss over close friends and your guys goes even next level because this was something you created. Did I understand that right?

Paul Tompkins 5:11

Yeah, yeah, we brought the deal, put the thing together and then grew it from there with them.

Joe Pomeroy 5:16

So in many aspects, there's a lot of people out there that will go. Well, that was the entrepreneurial route that you guys took. And then you got messed over. Right. So how did man there's a lot there. So let's take the personal aspect of it first, and then I do want to talk about how that experience, which still very much has an entrepreneurial experience to it, how that experience differs from what you're doing now as the flipping experts. Okay, so we'll come back to that. All right. All right. So let's talk about that personal aspect of it. And specifically to the safety aspect of it both the personal relationships and something you guys created for The beginning, just describe what that was like, Did you feel like this was going to be your your end all be all thing for the rest of your lives that you were doing? What did it feel like when that rug was pulled out from underneath you like, just tell me from that. And I want to hear both perspectives with you, Paul and Kelsey, whoever wants to go first.

Paul Tompkins 6:17

That's funny, because their perspectives are so different.

Kelsey Tompkins 6:21

When we moved out there, and when we were starting, I would say we really thought that that was our calling. We thought it was exactly what everything in our life had taught us and prepared us to be really good at. So we thought that that was kind of the end all be all, this is what we were going to do for life. So when that rug was pulled out from underneath us, it was so unexpected. And for me, it was heartbreaking. Even though there were parts of times where that job got so stressful and I now I look back and I see that gosh, that was such a blessing in disguise. And it happened for a reason and we learned and we grew from it and I'm so thankful because it led us to where we are now. Of course any thing unexpected like that losing a Job losing a loved one. Anything that brings you heartache is traumatic and it's something that you have to work through and get over before you go to the next step.

Joe Pomeroy 7:07

So you feel like this is meant to be your calling that everything in your life has led you to this, that it is the end all to be all. What first went through your mind when you're sitting in the office with the CEO, and he's saying, today's the day and you have 13 days left on your insurance?

Kelsey Tompkins 7:25

I don't think I was thinking because I had the tears flowing down my face.

Paul Tompkins 7:30

She was ugly crying Joe.

Kelsey Tompkins 7:31

Paul was the cool, sweet, respectful all the wonderful things you should be and I just I couldn't speak I couldn't think it was out of the blue

Joe Pomeroy 7:40

eyed so no thoughts so what emotions I mean, you're crying you're doing the ugly cry. Is it betrayal? Is it shock is it can't be true. I mean, what are you feeling? Is it anger? Is it sadness? Is it what is it what's going on Kelsey?

Kelsey Tompkins 7:54

For me, it was mostly just the what's next I felt lost. I felt okay. I thought this was it. But what what Do we do now we don't have insurance, we can't move back home, we left our family and friends, which was a big step for me because I'm super close to my family and friends to be out here. And now now what we're stuck in literally the middle of nowhere, we're out in this country. So it was what is gonna happen next? And how are we going to move past this one?

Joe Pomeroy 8:18

Yeah. So when we do get into what you guys are doing now, that's what I'm excited about talking about because what you provide will help couples and individuals that currently have one source of income and help them develop a second source. So should worst case scenarios happen? They already have their what's next taken care of. Right? That's really cool. When you talk about what's going through your mind what's causing the ugly cry, all of that stuff. You referred to what you're doing before with the resort as a calling and how everything had led you to do that. Mm hmm. Well, look at what you're doing now. And you're able to take that exact moment of despair unknown. Whatever was going on, and you're able to solve that problem for others. How cool is that?

Paul Tompkins 9:07

It's, it's amazing. The funny thing is we knew after that year it was like, it's okay for someone else to come in the shock got us. But like, Joe, I was calm. Like, I couldn't believe I was calm. How? I don't know. It was God. It was. It was God. Let's look, I'll say that because I mean, she's sitting there just crying. I'm shocked. And he's asking me questions about the business for the next five minutes while she's sitting there crying, like, what about this? And where are we at with this? And I'm like, dude, you just fired us? Like, what are you talking about? But But I'm sitting there and I'm answering them. Yep, yep. Uh huh. Okay, yeah. Yeah. And I think deep down inside it was because I was relieved. Like, really, it was. We felt like it was our calling. And we moved out there because we were helping serve children. We were helping kids in need. We were hosting events on the weekends that bring families together. So it wasn't money. It wasn't it was more about other people. But as the year went on, before we got let go, it was 7080 hours a week. It was 2am 3am. She's working on working. We had a short staff because they were trying to save money. And it was to the point where it wasn't that blessing anymore. So I, I think for me when we heard the news, I was kind of i was i was in shock, but I think that deep down, I was relieved. And like, Okay, good. This is fine. This is good. We don't know what's next. But everything's a cycle. I've learned that since I was a kid, everything comes and goes, all the bad stuff that happens ends, your bad day you go to sleep the night you wake up, you start over again. So for me, I knew we're always going to make it we were together. We had each other if we couldn't move back now we've moved back in a week in a month and a year doesn't matter where together we'll figure it out. So a little bit of peace but you know, then there's feelings. After you leave, right? Well, while you're sitting there trying to figure it all out for 30 40 50 days, and you just have to trust you have to trust, there was a reason that it happened. There's a god out there that's going to protect you. There's all these different things in your life that have already proven you're going to make it through it. So I think that's what it was for us. You know?

Joe Pomeroy 11:20

That's awesome. All right. So one of the things that you talked about in the time after, so there's that initial shock and, and I can think of experiences for me, when my oldest was about had just turned two. She had what's called a febrile seizure, her fever spiked really high and she just started seizing, and we had no idea what was going on. But in the moment, it was like, Okay, I know what to do with seizure, we'll get here we're laying on the ground, don't let her you know, move things away from her we got to call 911. I'm gonna call my sister and see if she can come over and watch our the newborn so that we can go to the hospital with the two year old and everything like that went happened during the moment. And then when the moment passed, and I done all that I can do And she wasn't seizing anymore, and she was at the hospital and we're waiting to get checked. Then it was like, all the why questions hit or you know, the the flood of emotions they hit and the why. Regardless, you know, whatever's going on in the economy in the best of times in the worst of times, changes happen, and surprises happen. And so at any point, we may find ourselves dealing with that. And so what did you guys do when you were faced with that after that calm after that, whatever, and then everything else hits, where their feelings of bitterness where their feelings of betrayal, and you mentioned relief, but how strong is that leave? Does it carry you through the questions? What was that transition? Like?

Paul Tompkins 12:41

For me, there was those feelings because we were told we were securing a job, we were told, hey, if there's a transition, you're fine, and we trusted these people, but at the same time, if we knew it was time to move on, it kind of cancels that out. At the same time. There's still these feelings of betrayal feeling like you're lied to because you were. But at the same time, we had a network already established where we were at with a local church and a local pastor, and we're getting counsel from him and Kelsey, his emotions are different. And we're trying not to really share them too much with each other because I don't want to cast like, put my burdens on her and like, I'm feeling this, this and this, then maybe she wasn't feeling that way. And now she's going, Well, me too. I love you. And I'm on your team. And now she's carrying some of this anger or whatever it might be. So I think for us it was we worked through it on our own a little bit, the first couple days. And then we got some wise counsel, and we just start talking to people like, Hey, this is what happened. This is how we felt. Are we taking it right and halfway, we'll talk they're like, thank God, you're not there anymore. Right? It was time to move on. I'm like, Yeah, you're actually right. Well, then why are you upset? You're absolutely right. So getting counsel from the right people and not the the haters out there or the negative people out there. That was always something to us that we were glad we had that support system. them in. What do you think?

Kelsey Tompkins 14:02

I agree with you completely. And I think just coming together, we were able to encourage each other, as well as look back on the life lessons of it. And that's the point. For us. That was the turning point of, you know, we're not meant to work for somebody else. Our destiny is to do something bigger than that. We don't want to be under somebody else's schedule. We want to control our destiny. We want to be in charge of when we can take vacations when we have to work when we can be a little bit more relaxed. So it was really a blessing and a great turning point for us.

Paul Tompkins 14:31

Yeah, it was. It was kind of in disguise. Like, God got us out of the area we were in for a season and then led us to where he wanted to because he knew we wouldn't have never left the other. You know, he never we never would have left. We were making great money. We had a great gig and it was great. We were comfortable the word you used. And then he gets us out of it. And just for a short season we he shows us like that's the one key we keep saying to each other like from that experience is we were never created. work for somebody else. We were never, we will never work for somebody else. Again, there's an entrepreneur has a certain heart, like they're willing to work 8090 hours a week for the same pace somebody works 44 because they know they're growing something they know they're making a bigger impact in the world. And I've heard it said a lot like, Hey, if you're working for somebody else, it takes away your ability to dream, right? Someone's paying you for 40 hours a week. You're working for their dream 40 hours a week and not focusing on your own. And to us, I had done that once or twice, gone back and forth. I was a marine. I was a state trooper Kelsey was in the pageant world. And we always were mixed in it. And it was like, God was saying, now's the time. Like I've prepared you for all these things. Now's the time to go do what I told you to do. And we want you to he wanted us to help people on a bigger level. That's where we got where we're at. Now.

Joe Pomeroy 15:47

I love that sometimes if we're in too much of a comfort zone or it's too comfortable, then it does require that external push to let go because otherwise it feels like total insanity to be like, well, everything's perfect and wonderful, but I'm gonna go Here now like it's just yeah sometimes you need that that outside push that God push. So we'll can keep moving forward to the story because you guys have such powerful energy and such glows about you I know it's just audio so everybody would just have to take my word for it they're glowing

Paul Tompkins 16:16

Yes, we are glowing everyone.

Joe Pomeroy 16:18

Really good energy. And as we talk about some of these things, I mean, those times are obviously not as bright. But something that's interesting that you mentioned that was key was the outside sources you talked about turning to the right sources, people that wanted to help you in your journey. And that's that that's pivotal for everything that we're doing we need those to surround ourselves with those healthy people in the right people with the right energy right. And so that's a lot of what you guys have created with flippin experts to be that right energy, that right go to source for others that are looking to build something. So now that we've gone through that transition from Okay, I'm in shock. And now I'm transitioning to, I can see that there's something better for us. And we don't want to work for ourselves. Which is, which is interesting. By the way, you guys have referred to this first situation as a job. And yet it was something that a plan you built, and you proposed, and you continually refer to it as a job, as opposed to what you're doing now. So tell us about that transition from and why you called it a job versus why now what you're doing is a business and what you're building the flipping experts.

Kelsey Tompkins 17:31

Yes. So we came up with the plan and the design for the job, as you say, but then we had people who came over us and told us, okay, we like your ideas. But now we're going to do it this way instead. And I think that kind of kept us off. And that's where a lot of the heart, that and the joy that we were getting from that initial we're building this place, it's going to be amazing. It's going to be this special haven for people to come to and get restoration and time with their family and we had all these dreams, but then the corporate side came into everything and it was all about them. Making money. And working from seven in the morning to

Paul Tompkins 18:03

two in the morning in the morning the next day.

Kelsey Tompkins 18:05

So that I think was the big transition of when it It came from what you could call an entrepreneurial adventure into being more of a job.

Paul Tompkins 18:14

Yeah. And it started out as an entrepreneurial thing. I mean, we weren't married yet. And we would meet at my house, and we're looking at blueprints and properties. And how do we find this because we both had we both wanted to serve. We both wanted to give back to kids and families and this and that. We needed a location outside of Jacksonville. To get people right there. Not nobody wants to go to the same place. So we were trying to get them a couple hours outside of Jacksonville, so they can experience it right. They drive somewhere they feel relief and all that. And then it it just like she said it started transitioning, so it turned back into a job once we started working there. And what we're doing now is we work for ourselves. We build our own schedules, we have to because we're totally different people and she's a night owl. I'm a morning person. So we're building our own brand, that we can impact people the way we want to, and we feel the way God's telling us to versus Okay, I can do a little bit over here, a 5%, but then 95% corporate. So for us now we're in charge of our destiny, we're in charge of her income, we're in charge of, I mean, if I make 200,000 more dollars, that's more I can tithe that's more I can help the local community that's more outreaches we can do because God's providing that money for us. So there's really no cap to what we can do, because we're not under a corporate job or a certain business.

Joe Pomeroy 19:37

I think that's a great perspective to have, as people are looking to, to grow whatever business they have, whatever it is that they're doing, or maybe they're looking to start something is you have to know what matters and you have to know what boundaries you'll be able to put on that. And you guys were limited in the boundaries you're able to put on the resort because of the financial balance. And the structure how whatever was going on there, whereas now you're doing something, you're in complete control of those boundaries. That's right. So I think those are really important questions to ask and to define as we're moving into something. So tell us more now that you're started flipping experts, and but you don't just flip houses. I mean, you guys, why did you decide to also teach and instruct? I mean, how did that come about?

Paul Tompkins 20:25

Man, seeing people go into something and not have the training to do it. It just, it ate me up. It ain't Kelsey, we'd have people come to us and say, Hey, listen, I just did that. Because basically, a lot of people, they follow us on our website or social media, and they've seen all the houses we're flipping and how beautiful they are. That's because of her. She handles the design I just handled up. She tells me what to build and we build but other people were out there without any training, and they come up to us after every event like hey, I did this. I did this and I lost 30,000 I'm never gonna flip out. Again, I'm like, Okay, well walk me through it. And I've actually gone and looked at people's houses. I'm like, How did this happen? or How did like I pay my contractor walked off the job, we were halfway done renovating it. I'm like, why did you pay them? I don't understand. So just seeing the turmoil that these people were going through, and they were losing their money, their parents money, lenders, money, all because they didn't have the training, they didn't have a coach, they didn't have somebody in their local area to teach them or walk them through something. And it just, it just kept coming up and coming up and coming up. And we were actually at a conference, had no plan on building anything, keep doing our flips. We're making great money. We're helping our community. We're doing all these outreaches and then we went to a conference with Brendon Burchard and Dean graziosi. And Brendan gets up and he just starts talking about this and online courses and how you make a bigger impact in your industry and in your world and how you can help other people succeed like you succeeded, like don't keep that information to yourself, but get it out there for more people. Like how do you do it? and Brandon just so happened to have an online course and we got up hop the line and bought it right away, came back and just started building it. And I mean, just, hey people, here's here's how you here's how you do it, right? Here's how you don't get crushed. Here's how you can make a living for you and your family. And it just kind of kicked off. We didn't even plan to do it.

Joe Pomeroy 22:17

Nice. Alright, so Kelsey, I'm like, you know, I'm a night owl. In my earlier years when I you know, flipping through channels late at night, and you see the guy and he's got his fancy shirt with the sleeves just rolled up so we can show off his big bling watch and he's got the spiky hair driving around in his h3 and it's, you know, hey, buy my 297 thing and I'll give you everything you need to know. I mean, how does what you guys do an offer differ from those late night infomercials that are promising the quick fix and the million dollars tomorrow?

Kelsey Tompkins 22:49

I would say that's part of why we started our online training course honestly, we saw the gurus out there who are promising the world but not really giving all the pieces that you need to be successful. I think that broke my heart because people are shoveling out the money, the cash, give me the quick answers I want I want to know, yes, I want help, but they weren't getting the full help. So we don't think of ourselves as, as gurus. So to say we want to be a trusted source, where our students can come to us and we're gonna open the doors and show you exactly how to do what we do, and how to avoid making the mistakes and pitfalls that we had to learn by doing when we first started out instead of having somebody coach and teach us through it.

Paul Tompkins 23:29

Yeah. And we, we put our money where our mouth is, we just finished with a student who just did his first flip with us and the profit net profit was over $97,000 profit. That isn't the norm. I mean, norms 40 to 50,000. But do you know the impact that's going to make he's a married couple, they're 25 ish, 26 ish, two kids that are just looking to grow. They're very talented people, but we put our money up, we're like, Here's $200,000. Let's do the deal. together. You went through my course you believe in it, I can see you guys have potential. Let's go, we'll partner with you. So it's not even go to my course that I'm done with you. Like, we go all the way. It's, hey, come to my membership, go see our live stuff, go buy the course, if you want to take it to the next step, let's go, let's go to a three day workshop. Let's go to coaching, let's, however, we can best serve them because everybody's different. But some of them are like, I'm gonna go all the way, Paul, let's do this. I have a little bit of money and you teach me and let's do this thing together. And we will. So we've teamed up and we've had students make 47,037 87 I mean, all the numbers are all over the place. But it's it's us just wanting to see them succeed because all they have to do is duplicate what they learned in one house two, three or four year. And if the average flip right now profit is like 75 or I'm sorry, 5057 57 to 60,000 let's just say 40 grand, let's be very modest. 40 grand.

Joe Pomeroy 24:57

Are you talking about in Florida or is this nationwide?

Paul Tompkins 25:00

Nationwide nationwide. Yeah. First for a married family. And we always have a lot of younger people come to us some older people, but a lot of younger, married couples come to us. And if they did three deals one every three or four months, and make $40,000, that's over $100,000 profit. Like in their, like, we we cheer for them. We love them because we know it radically changes somebody's life when they're making 50 grand, and she's a stay at home mom with two kids to change that and say, okay, you're both in this together, you can still work your $50,000 job I did. I was a state trooper and did that for three years while I was flipping houses on the side. You can do it. But now she's involved designing she's involved staging the house and she's finding purposes that have I'm just staying at home with two kids. I'm just a mom. No, like, you're in the deal you're in and everybody starts to find purpose. Everybody wins. everage they're collecting that money and they're going okay, now we can afford college for her. Now we can buy that car for the 16 year old now we can afford braces for so and so. So just seeing that impact I think that's ours is all heart man we just you can call me you can text me You can I have people do it to me day and night. They can go on our social media, whatever it takes, but we're going to give them the answers they need just so they can be successful because it's about them. It's not about us.

Joe Pomeroy 26:25

I love that and just for our listeners, when Paul said just a mom he did air quotes now you can't see that. He did he did air quotes

Paul Tompkins 26:33

My wife slapped me under the table

Joe Pomeroy 26:36

but I love that because in one of my earlier episodes, Erica and Rusty Ryal Erica talked about how you know she had three boys and she was a stay at home mom and she loved being a mom, but there was a part of her that wanted to get involved that wanted to contribute in different ways. And so this is something that that provides that opportunities so that you really get the the chance for the best of both worlds. Now Paul, you talked About, I mean, you're heavily involved. And I love that. And I think that's so important and to have that connection, and that, you know that in and of itself, I guarantee if if, you know, five years ago, I'm calling the guy in the Hummer and dial in that one 800 number that I'm never actually talking to him. There's never actually any involvement there. But with that level of involvement, and you talked about at your job, you're getting up at 7am. And you're working till 2am. I mean, granted now you're building your dream. It's a business not a job, you're building your dream. But how do you create boundaries, so that you and Kelsey make sure that your marriage remains the priority?

Paul Tompkins 27:45

Come on, let Kelsey answer that one.

Kelsey Tompkins 27:48

I think the best learning lessons for me I learned after our first year of marriage, and it was that we each have our own strengths and weaknesses and our own gifts and talents and when you put them together It makes us so much stronger. But our first year of marriage, I spent so much time trying to be like Paul, he's a morning bird. So he wakes up at 530 in the morning, and he has his plan set. He has his routine, and he's ready to dive into work. But I'm the night owl. I get creative at night, I do my designing at night for our houses, I answer emails, I do the accounting. That's when my brain is just on fire, and I'm ready to go. So we had a lot of frustration in our first year of marriage, because first I was trying to be all like him, which led to

Paul Tompkins 28:29

nobody can be like me, I'm just saying,

Kelsey Tompkins 28:31

I wake up early, and it led to frustration, and I was grouchy. And I was a lot less productive. But then we came together and we figured out our strengths and our weaknesses. And we realized, okay, so the best time for us to strategize is in the middle of the day. And that's when we come together, we make our most important business decisions. But we also take time to work out together. We make sure we have family dinners together. So we make sure that we prioritize our time just as a couple and then we can go through and At night, he goes to bed and I'm doing everything I need to do on the business and that he's not involved in. So I think it's so important just to set that schedule.

Joe Pomeroy 29:08

I love that when you talk about prioritizing your time together. I mean, that to me sounds like okay, we've got our Can you talk about scheduling, we've got our calendar, we've got our schedule. So when are we going to have our you know, we know that this is what our family dinners are, we know that this is going to be our gym time. Those things go on the calendar, and then as individuals, all right, you know, Kelsey, for you. Okay, so in the evening, and this is what I want to get this stuff done. And Paul, for you, okay, in the morning, this is what I want to get stuff done. I think a mistake that couples make is they try to set their individual schedules first, and then somehow pair that up with their spouse. And when you do it that way, there's not enough openings that overlap. And and it devalues the time together, frankly. So I really like your guy's approach to that. Paul, what would you add to that as far as how you're able to set boundaries in your relationship.

Paul Tompkins 30:00

I'm a big planner, I have a daily planner. Everything I do has to be thought of ahead of time a day ahead of time a week ahead of time. My calendar is built out a week ahead of time with flexibility in there. A lot of people build a calendar and have it so packed, there's no flexibility, stuff comes up stuff happens. I think my aha moment was like, one day, I just went to Kelsey and I hand her a piece of paper and pen, I said, What would make you the happiest if your day look like this and write it down? And she said, Well, if I slept until nine if I did this from nine to 10, and if I did this from 10 to 11, and then we worked out from 11 to 12. And then she built out her day, and I took my day and I looked at it and said okay, where can I be flexible? Babe, I can't do this five days a week, I can do three. Okay, let's start with three. And then we just we gradually just grew into each other's strengths and said, Okay, and then I realized, if I'm like, Hey, take a half a day off. It's not a big deal. I'll go handle this stuff over here. Like she's more productive. I was like, Oh, you could have the week off. But that's just like when you're don't feel like you have to do it, and that you get to do it. You do more. Like my Saturdays and Sundays I get more visions, more stuff built out. I'm just like, I'm just gonna relax today. And then Kelsey will see me like knockout five things. She's like, I thought you weren't doing that. And I'm like, I didn't have to, but it was so cool. I was relaxed, and I just did it. But But for us, I think it's just boundaries. It has to be me and her first. Right? Like, obviously, my relationship of God and her relation with God, we that's our own time, but she has to come before anything. If she's not happy, we're not going to stay married. If we don't stay married, the business is going to fail. The business fails. If we don't have money. If we don't have money, we're not doing the things we love. So, for me, I love her to death. I'm gonna do whatever I can do to make her happy. And if she succeeds, I automatically win. So that's kind of where I'm at. It's just it if I can keep her inner giftings. And then the other stuff we give away. I hired a virtual assistant. And I'm like, Listen, I'm not doing these five things, because what I used to do, and that's where I messed up, Joe, I'd be like, I don't want to do this, this or this. And I'd be like, Kelsey, I need you to do these three things. Oh, well, that's not fair to Kelsey. So finally, we hired we hired an assistant virtual assistant and we're like, Hey, listen, she can do these 10 things is five of them are off your plate fire off my plate and now it freed up time for my schedule. It freed up mental stress it freed up doing things I didn't want to do. So that that helped me a lot Joe,

Joe Pomeroy 32:34

I love that there's a lot of great advice in there to to listen to again and again and find out the different pieces. I love also that you know, and you guys know from my book and stuff that that's something that's important to me is but having that vision like What's your ideal? What's an ideal day look like? I think too often we look way out. And we say what's my 10 year goal and not great this vision of what 10 years is gonna look like like no idea what I need tomorrow to look like. And, you know, you do need that long term goal, you need to know the destination where the cruise ship is going before you get on board. But you also need to know what you're looking for in the day to day things. And that's beautiful that you guys have done that. And I think that speaks both to your character, as well as the quality that you can provide to others as they learn the systems and can skip that first year that you guys went through and those challenges, right? I guess we'll go ahead and wrap up. So two questions. I asked everybody before the end of the show, or at the end of the show. First, if there's one principle that you'd like the listeners to walk away with, what would that be? And second, I believe you guys have a gift for the listeners. And so tell us about that and how we can get a hold of that. But first the principle.

Paul Tompkins 33:47

I think our biggest principle as a family and as a company is always take a step. You know so many people allow fear to creep in, but they don't even know what they're afraid of that this this like you said this could happen. And this could happen this guy, okay? What if it doesn't just take a step and see what happens. And a lot of our students, a lot of our friends, like, that's what we're always teaching. It's like just you don't know until you take this step, even if it's a wrong step, like as long as you thought about it and plan it or had a conversation, when it just can take, continue to take a step. That's our biggest push. And if you do that, even if it's once a day, that's 365 things you've accomplished in a year. And that's kind of what you're saying everybody's worried about 10 years. It's like no, like, take a step today, or change something in your life today, or pivot something in your life today. And just keep doing it every day. And watch where you end up next week, let alone in a year.

Joe Pomeroy 34:40

Awesome. Thank you. All right, Kelsey, you're gonna tell us about this gift.

Paul Tompkins 34:44

Give them something.

Kelsey Tompkins 34:46

We want the listeners all of our new friends to join us and become flippin experts to so if you go to WWW dot flippin experts.com No,

Paul Tompkins 34:55

no g No.

Kelsey Tompkins 34:57

No tn flipping just FL p p i n experts calm and go to buy our training course. Use the code, hashtag forward all capital letters, and you'll get 20% off so you can become a flippin expert team

Paul Tompkins 35:11

and actually just they can go to our website even in just click the button for free training and they get like 35 days of free training wow for free, no obligations, no nothing. So if they don't even want the course and they just want to figure out who we are, hey, go click on that free training and you'll get an email every day for about 35 days with awesome videos and awesome training.

Joe Pomeroy 35:29

Well, that's perfect. Start with the free content. Get the videos learn about you guys see the value see the heart that you guys have already shared on today's episode, and find out if flipping real estate is for you. And you guys do more than just flip houses but the different aspects that you guys do see if see if you as the listeners see if what Paul and Kelsey do is for you. And if it is, then when you go to purchase the course use that hashtag forward and get like Kelsey said get that 20% off. So you guys that's awesome. I I've really enjoyed our time together, I really enjoy the energy that you guys have brought, and also the heart that you clearly give to the people that you seek to serve. And I think that speaks to the success you've already achieved and will continue to achieve. So thank you so much for being on the show.

Paul Tompkins 36:15

Joe, thanks for having us. We love being here. If you ever need us again, give us a buzz. We're happy to jump on.

Joe Pomeroy 36:25

Thank you for joining us on today's episode. If you found the information helpful, remember to share it with your friends, family. And make sure to subscribe on Apple podcasts or your favorite podcast player. You can find more episodes at Forward with Joe Pomeroy calm and we'll see you next time.